The truth is that I don't have much of a garden, I do however have lots of stones. I began thinking about them a few years back when I was in my front yard digging them up hoping that I could remove enough of them to allow a garden to grow. The garden never really happened, but the stones have stayed with me. My yard and my mind are littered with them. This blog is a place for exploring the metaphor of stones as it pertains to life and faith.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Morning Thanks and Evening Graces

I have mixed feelings about these rocks with words engraved into them. I'm just not sure what to make of them. Large, like the one pictured here, or small enough to carry around in a pocket, they are typically flat, and rounded, or oval, worn down and smoothed out in the rough and tumble life of a river. They can be found in garden centers, and gift shops. Soothing words like "peace", "love", "happiness", "contentment", and "gratitude" are engraved into their otherwise plain grey surfaces, one word to each stone. I like the softness of their cool grey surfaces and the contrast of their smoothed and rounded symmetry with the deep sharp lines and curves carved into their surface.

I guess I don't understand their purpose. Are they strictly decorative? This one, in Mom's garden, lends a certain natural beauty to her planter, but it would do that all by itself, without any word on its surface. Is it intended as a sermon? Should I read "be grateful" when I see a rock that says GRATITUDE? Is it a proclamation? Does it greet our visitors with the message "grateful people live here"? Is it a sign of some kind? "Something good up ahead, be looking for it . . . " ? Or is it a simple reminder that though there are many hard things in life, like stones, there is much for which we can give thanks? It seems to me that meaning comes with context. Perhaps the lack of context is what bothers me about these stones, these words in isolation nestled into a garden planter, gathering dust on a bookshelf, or suspended, forgotten in the pocket of some sweater hanging in the back of the closet.

It occurs to me that my recent Facebook posts, Morning Thanks and Evening Graces, may also need context. They too appear as words in isolation, yet they are written with intention, have an origin. After all, only God creates something out of nothing. Several influences have converged in my life lately, resulting in these daily posts. My recent reading has included a blog and a book which focus on gratitude, and which recognize this simple truth, that gratitude is possible even when the stones of life trip us up, and lay us on our faces.

The blog I've been reading is called Stuff in the Basement, by J. C. Schaap. He posts his near daily essays under the heading Morning Thanks, and often includes pictures he's taken of his subject, lovely ones he's gotten with a much better camera than mine. The tenor of his essays suggest that the practice of giving thanks keeps us real, and grounded, and I like that idea. I also resonate with the idea of beginning one's day with giving thanks. You can find his blog at siouxlander.blogspot.com.

The book, "One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are" by Ann Voskamp, resonates deeply with things in my own soul. It's the story of a woman transformed by the practice of gratitude, and is one of the loveliest books I've read in a long while. Ann dives right into the depths of real life, laying a stone, a big one, and bloody too, right in her reader's path. It makes for a difficult beginning, but it's worth it to keep going, because if you can get past that big rock you'll find honey. Gratitude does not come easily for Ann, she strains to learn the art of noticing the graces strewn in her path, but once she catches on, she soars. Naming these gifts was a challenge from a friend, to write down, if she could, one thousand things that made her happy. So she started a list . . .

The most recent and powerful reminder for me to be ever mindful of God's gifts, however, was the movie The Tree of Life. See it if you can. We had to travel over fifty miles to find a theater showing it. Worth every mile.

I haven't the time, or the inclination to write a daily essay about the things for which I'm thankful, like Mr. Schaap does, nor do I struggle to see the abundance of God given gifts by which I'm daily surrounded, like Ann Voskamp did. Simple joys and abundant beauty arrest my attention numerous times daily, and gratitude wells up. The discipline for me is not in the practice of keeping a daily journal, or in noticing and list making. What comes with difficulty for me is the speaking, saying my thanks out loud, not hoarding those moments between me and God.  Naming things that stop me in my tracks and give me joy, and acknowledging out loud my gratitude for God's generosity, require opening my hands and giving a part of myself away. Yet, the discipline of speaking up is one I think I need to begin learning, practicing. Morning Thanks offered for the hope and promise of the day, and Evening Graces for the days when saying thanks once simply isn't enough.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Meditation on a (nearly) 30 year friendship


I thought of you this evening, my friend, while I was out watering the yard, of the coffee, and conversation we shared this morning to celebrate your special day, of your easy contentedness with such a simple, quiet celebration, and I wondered how many cups of coffee we’ve shared together over the years. What is it that makes a lasting friendship? How much laughter, and how many tears, and how many times have those things flowed into one another, laughing so hard it hurt, and how many times have the tears somehow miraculously turned into laughter in spite of the pain? How many cups of coffee, or tea, or glasses of wine have been kindly offered and shared in this friendship? How many mochas? How many dunkies? How much chocolate? How many trips to Chico together, to shop, to serve, to learn, to worship? 

I thought of the things we’ve done together and the places we’ve gone, quilt shows we’ve seen, trips to the fabric store, quilting classes we’ve taken together, and quilts we’ve started together that you finished long ago, sisters to those still “ripening” in pieces on my shelf. And I wonder how many fat quarters we’ve traded back and forth, and just how many yards of fabric are woven into this friendship, how many pins in how many quilt sandwiches clamped down to your kitchen table? And how many meals have we shared at that table, each one a gracious gift of your warm hospitality? And how many books have we passed back and forth, and how many movies have we seen together? How many women’s retreats have we shared? How many walks have we taken? 

You’ve shared your life and your heart with me in so many ways, and you’ve shared in my joys and sorrows as well. How many hours have we spent in hospital waiting rooms, waiting together, or waiting for one another? How many words of encouragement have been spoken? How much comfort given? How many phone calls to blow off steam? How much patience, forgiveness, and grace extended? In how many ways have we explored, probed, and questioned our faith, and how many times been strengthened by the experience? How many times have we wondered at the mystery of our lives, and tried to comprehend God’s ways?

I have no idea. Thirty (okay 29, but who’s counting?) years is a long time. What I can tell you is that you’ve been an amazing blessing in my life. You’ve brought a richness to the seasons of life we’ve shared together, a wisdom that comes from a steadfast faith. I so admire your outgoing friendliness, that graciousness you possess which you so easily extend to others, the loving way you include people. You have a compassionate heart Kathy, and I’m very grateful to be able to call you my friend. I hope this has been a very special day for you, and that you have lots more of them! 

Gratefully your friend,
Janis